Mother's Day. We never made that much of a big deal of it when I was growing up. I do remember trying to make it special for Mom though. I remember when I was little picking out a gold necklace with a rose flower pendant on it for her from the store one year. And I remember making her various crafts in school classes. And I remember one Mother's Day going early out into the yard and picking some flowers and then putting them in a little vase and taking that to her in bed along with a bowl of chocolate chips. I guess I thought chocolate chips were sufficient for a breakfast in bed haha. And I remember once when we were young Eric and I tried to make a cake for Mom, (not sure if it was Mother's Day or her birthday) but we didn't know what "confectioner's sugar" was so in the frosting we tried to use regular granulated sugar and it was a grainy mess! Mom was a good sport about it anyway though. My mom definitely laughs more easily than I do. I have many memories from my childhood of her laughing about some minor mishap or other. She would laugh so hard that she would cry sometimes. Like once, she found a book full of sweet notes and memories written by various ward members that was supposed to be given to a certain woman before she moved away but Mom had forgotten to ever give it to her and then found it years after the woman was gone! I was mortified and told Mom, "You're a horrible person!" And Mom just burst out laughing and couldn't stop. She was literally sitting on the floor just laughing and couldn't even get up. Now, this is not to say she never got upset, she definitely yelled at us a fair amount too, but she liked to laugh and play with us and now likes to play with my kids. She's a great teacher, great at helping kids to think, explore, and expand their horizons. I'm grateful that she wants to be a part of my children's lives and that she has the opportunity to visit us often.
Reflecting on motherhood is an interesting thing. Motherhood is heavy. It's a lot. I sometimes worry that I'm completely screwing it up. But it is also the greatest joy in my life. My children are everything to me. Before each was born, I felt like my life was good and full. But with the coming of each child, I can't imagine life without them. My heart really did expand with each one. They each bring so much to our family and my life.
Levi, my son, my firstborn. He is such a handsome boy. I love how his hair gets all curly in the back when it's long. I love his eyes. I love that he's tall and energetic and active. He is a good brother to his sisters and a good friend. He is so incredibly creative and imaginative. I kind of can't wait to see what he grows up to do because I know it's going to be amazing, but I also love him just as he is now with his snuggles and cuddles. I love how he is still young enough to ask, "Mom can you play with me?" I know that stage is fleeting and will come to an end as he grows and gets more independent and involved in his own life and with his own friends. I want to be better about saying "yes" to him.
Emery, my oldest daughter, my Emmie Mae. Oh that girl. She is so precious to me but she has also been trying me so much of late. She has all the big feelings and expresses them all. Each day is the "worst day ever!" and also "the best day ever!" Few experiences are ever just ok. It's all amazing and she is so excited she is jumping up and down and squealing or it's horrible and she's stomping her foot and yelling. But in the midst of all of that, she is so loving and kind and caring. She always wants to take care of Isla, play and share with Levi and snuggle with me and Eric. She's so smart and has a great memory. She is doing great with her gymnastics and her reading and is sooo excited to start kindergarten in the fall. I'm going to miss our one-on-one time doing puzzles or playing games or doing nails together while Isla naps in the afternoons but I know Emery is going to do great in school.
Isla, my sweet baby. She is growing up so fast! She is talking so much now and seems to learn many new words every day! She is even starting to speak in little sentences like "Mommy come!" and "no more" and "wait Dada." She is starting to show more and more mischievousness and gives these adorable sidelong glances before she hurries off to do something naughty. I love her belly laugh and her curly hair and her hugs and kisses which are just the best. I love her energy and how she already knows how to jump and likes to play tag. She literally brightens my day every day.
